A thank you to those of you who reached out to tornado victim Amanda Patrick, one of our KAEE members:
Please accept big hugs and
immense heartfelt gratitude, first and foremost, with this message…
As some many have unselfishly
given of their time, energy, support and resources to help me during one of the
darkest times of my life, along with this note of thanks, I wanted to go a step
beyond to send a quick update on how I am doing and how your support has made
such a difference… It’s also a chance for me to try and find the adequate
words to express my gratitude as nothing truly seems to even come close to
conveying all that I feel. I will, though, give it my best as my heart
overflows with such heartfelt gratitude, hope, faith and love via your
altruism…
When the storm struck, it was the furthest thing from my mind in knowing that I
would not only lose my home but that 7 neighbors and friends would not make it
out. That has been the tear on my soul. I remember sleeping through
hundreds of warnings back home in KY too but never got up, always thinking it
would simply pass me by. For whatever reason, though, I got up that night
as the siren woke me up about 5 minutes before. I checked my weather.com
app on my phone, saw a flood of warnings and watches and decided to play it
safe and go to the tub. Before getting in there, though, I called my
neighbor and colleague, Donna, as they always watched out for me and worried
about me. I got in, and things went by so quick. After it came
through, I called my parents as I crawled out of the tub I took refuge in (home
was crushed by a beam from across the street; however, it stopped the house
from flying away and left the roof in place to protect me as the bathroom wall
blew out and provided a perfect pocket of protection on the ground as I
remained in the tub).
I struggle with the guilt of
knowing that I walked out and others did not. Though I had met some while
others I had not, we were a tight-knit bunch, and we all watched out for one
another. Having officially moved in mid-December 2011, I had been
welcomed my first night at home by a sweet lady named Ms. Lynda. I will
always remember her bubbly smile and the yummy homemade pumpkin pie she brought
me as she extended our her arms for a hug, welcoming me to Brady Street.
During her funeral, every one of her family remarked to me, “Oh you are the
Forest Service girl. She worried about you being all alone and away from
home. She loved you.” My neighbor and coworker, Donna, and her
husband Randy, took special care of watching over me, checking on me, inviting
me to supper, picking up packages during the holidays as they knew I was out of
town. The very day before the storm, Donna had talked with me at work
about retirement. Being a breast cancer survivor, and Randy battling lung
cancer, she wanted to retire as she said “I don’t know how much time we
have left together, and I want to spend every moment I can with
him.” To this day and each day forward, I hold tight to such stories but
also process the pain that comes with knowing that some of the most gracious
and kind people I know never had a chance.
One of the most comforting parts of the overall healing process is that I have
become close to so many families who lost loved ones on my little street, and
that helps me to talk through and process so much as every one of them have
been there for me and have reminded me to keep moving forward and to know that
God has a plan. We’ve become a tight-knit group, and for those who
survived, we all plan to return once our duplexes are rebuilt (construction
starts today, 4/3/12). I am better moment by moment, and I can honestly
say that were it not for the kindness, altruism, support and love from family, friends,
kindred spirits and family within my EE world, and my U.S. Army Corps of
Engineers/U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service and U.S. Forest Service family
members, I would not be making it. Y’all have been a spark of hope, love
and light during this dark period, and I firmly believe, faith and hope in
hand, that better days ARE ahead.
So, for today, I am working to assemble my temporary apartment into
order. I was blessed to find a place about 7 miles north of Harrisburg in
Raleigh, IL. The people who own the apartment live on a farm, and they
are truly wonderful people. I am adjusting to night noises and critter
sounds rather than cards, neighbors and other noises that come via living in
town, but I am slowly but surely becoming a country girl. J Momma and Dad have what we could salvage back home, and once my
new duplex is ready for move in, hopefully by late 2012 or sooner, we’ll begin
the process of moving back. So many lessons in all of this, such as my
will needing to take more of a back seat to that of God’s (stubborn
planner/type A of a soul), it is okay to not know what lies ahead but more so
to enjoy the ride, learn to appreciate the simplest of joys and never try to
worry… Learning to accept help has been a HUGE lesson too as many of you
know that is a weakness for me. So I have definitely learned from that
one in particular, and in looking back thus far, I will always and forever be
grateful for the love and kindness shown for were it not for you and your
prayers, calls, texts, etc, I would not be here. You’ve lived out such
gracious and unselfish love in being there for me as you have, and though my
words seem to fall short, please know that for each moment I am blessed to
have, I will spend it living out the love shown to be, ever and always paying
it forward.
I apologize too for being so
out of pocket via missed phone calls and texts. I am normally on top of
things so much more but tend to go nonstop each day between work and
reassembling my personal life. Please know how much each have meant to
me, though. I’ve saved so many, listening to them over and over, holding
tight to the love shown…
I am always here if you need me, and I pray daily for your health and
happiness, hoping that God keep you and yours close and that He blesses you
more than you could ever imagine… Thank you for all you’ve done to help
during this moment in my life, and please know that I am always here if you
need me…
Much love and heartfelt
gratitude, today and always,
Amanda